2007 Collected Thoughts

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Thoughts to Ponder editor

2007 Collected Thoughts

Date Thought Author Author's
Title

01/01

Happy New Year! Factel Staff  

01/02

A New Years resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.    

01/03

"Example isn't another way to teach, it's the only way to teach." Albert Einstein  

01/04

"People are getting smarter nowadays, they're letting lawyers, instead of their conscience, be their guide." Will Rogers  

01/05

"Common looking people are the best in the world: that is the reason the Lord makes so many of them." Abraham Lincoln  

01/06

"There are no passengers on Spaceship Earth. We are all crew." Marshall McLuhan  

01/07

"Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent." Issac Asimov  

01/08

"A man's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink." W.C. Fields  

01/09

"It is much easier to be critical than to be correct." Benjamin Disraeli  

01/10

"We don't stop playing because we grow old, we grow old because we stop playing." George Bernard Shaw  

01/11

"Some folks are wise and some otherwise." Josh Billings  

01/12

"The only time my wife and I had a simultaneous orgasm was when the judge signed the divorce papers." Woody Allen  

01/13

"Coffee isn't my cup of tea." Samuel Goldwyn  

01/14

"Adversity is the first path to truth." Lord Byron  

01/15

"If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee." Abraham Lincoln  

01/16

"I don't want to achieve immortality through my work .... I want to acheive it through not dying." Woody Allen  

01/17

"Reason should direct, and appetite obey." Cicero  

01/18

"Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves." Confucius  

01/19

"Give all to love; obey thy heart." Ralph Waldo Emerson  

01/20

"In this world second thoughts, it seems, are best." Euripides  

01/21

"A slip of the foot you may soon get over, but a slip of the tongue you may never get over." Benjamin Franklin  

01/22

"The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than work." Robert Frost  

01/23

"The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong." Mahatma Gandhi  

01/24

"Nothing is worth more than this day." Johann Wolfgang von Goethe  

01/25

"I never put on a pair of shoes until I've worn them at least five years." Samuel Goldwyn  

01/26

"Do not bite at the bait of pleasure till you know there is no hook beneath it." Thomas Jefferson  

01/27

"Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names." John F. Kennedy  

01/28

"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter." Martin Luther King  

01/29

"He who knows does not speak. He who speaks does not know." Lao-tzu  

01/30

"She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon." Groucho Marx  

01/31

"Follow your inclinations, with due regard for the policeman around the corner." W. Somerset Maugham  

02/01

"Conscience is a mother-in-law whose visit never ends." H.L. Mencken  

02/02

"In heaven all the interesting people are missing." Friedrich Nietzsche  

02/03

"I say, time wounds all heels." John Lennon  

02/04

"Take care of the luxuries and the necessities will take care of themselves." Dorothy Parker  

02/05

"Speak when you are angry -- and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret." Lawrence J. Peter  

02/06

"Ignorance, the root and stem of every evil." Plato  

02/07

"Abortion is advocated only by persons who have themselves been born." Ronald Reagan  

02/08

"The height of cleverness is to be able to conceal it." Francois de la Rochefoucauld  

02/09

"A woman is like a tea bag - you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water." Eleanor Roosevelt  

02/10

"Be sincere, be brief, be seated." Franklin D. Roosevelt  

02/11

"When you play, play hard; when you work, don't play at all." Theodore Roosevelt  

02/12

"I got kicked out of ballet because I pulled a groin muscle. It wasn't mine." Rita Rudner  

02/13

"The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time." Bertrand Russell  

02/14

"Difficulties strengthen the mind, as labour the body." Seneca  

02/15

"When a thing is funny, search it carefully for a hidden truth." George Bernard Shaw  

02/16

"Bad men live that they may eat and drink, whereas good men eat and drink that they may live." Socrates  

02/17

"Fortune helps the brave." Terence 185 BC - 159 BC

02/18

"Be true to your word, your work, and your friend." Henry David Thoreau  

02/19

"Little by little, one travels far." J.R.R. Tolkien  

02/20

"Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first." Mark Twain  

02/21

"I think that when you invite people to your home you invite them to yourself." Oprah Winfrey  

02/22

"Every man is guilty of all the good he didn't do." Voltaire  

02/23

"I dig Hannibal. Hannibal had real guts. He rode elephants into Cartilage." Mike Tyson  

02/24

"We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office." Aesop  

02/25

"It is horrifying that we have to fight our own government to save the enviornment." Ansel Adams  

02/26

"The end of labor is to gain leisure." Aristotle  

02/27

"I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me." Fred Allen  

02/28

"The darkest places in hell are reserved for those who maintain their neutrality in times of moral crisis." Dante Alighieri  

02/29

"A memorandum is not written to inform the reader but to protect the writer." Dean Acheson  

03/01

"The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any." Fred Astaire  

03/02

"It took me seventeen years to get 3,000 hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course." Hank Aaron  

03/03

"Everything you need for better future and success has already been written. And guess what? All you have to do is go to the library." Henri Frederic Amiel  

03/04

"Friends are born, not made." Henry B. Adams  

03/05

"Life is pleasant, death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome." Isaac Asimov  

03/06

"For true success, ask yourself these four questions: Why? Why not? Why not me? Why not now?" James Allen  

03/07

"Don't talk about what you have done or what you're going to do." Thomas Jefferson  

03/08

"When firearms go, all goes. We need them every hour." George Washington  

03/09

"Work is the curse of the drinking classes." Oscar Wilde  

03/10

"The right of a nation to kill a tyrant in case of necessity can no more be doubted than to hang a robber, or kill a flea." John Adams  

03/11

"Aerodynamically, the bumble bee shouldn't be able to fly. But the bumble bee doesn't know that so it goes on flying anyway." Mary Kay Ash  

03/12

"How much more grievous are the consequenses of anger than the causes of it." Marcus Aurelius  

03/13

"Prejudice is like a hair across your cheek. You can't see it, you can't find it with your fingers, but you keep brushing at it because the feel of it is irritating." Marian Anderson  

03/14

"Experience is a good teacher, but she sends in terrific bills." Minna Antrim  

03/15

"I'll beat him so bad he'll need a shoehorn to put his hat on." Muhammad Ali  

03/16

"There are no lazy veteran lion hunters." Norman Augustine  

03/17

Two thirds of the earth is covered with water. The other third is covered by auditors from the home office. The Master Adjuster  

03/18

"He that is kind is free, though he is a slave; he that is evil is a slave, though he be a king." St. Augustine  

03/19

"I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it's the government." Woody Allen  

03/20

"Men are like steel. Whenever they lose their temper, they lose their worth." Chuck Norris  

03/21

"Focus on remedies, not faults." Jack Nicklaus  

03/22

"If you're playing a poker game and you look around the table and can't tell who the sucker is, it's you." Paul Newman  

03/23

"Without deviation progress is not possible." Frank Zappa  

03/24

"I can, therefore I am." Simone Weil  

03/25

"I think, therefore I am." Rene Descartes  

03/26

"I drink, therefore I am." W.C. Fields  

03/27

"Anyone who isn't confused really doesn't understand the situation." Edward R. Murrow  

03/28

"It will be of little avail to the people that the laws are made by men of their own choice if the laws are so voluminous that they cannot be read, or so incoherent that they cannot be understood." James Madison  

03/29

"Some of the worst mistakes of my life have been haircuts." Jim Morrison  

03/30

"One percent of ballplayers are leaders of men. The other ninety-nine percent are followers of women." John McGraw  

03/31

"Bad humor is an evasion of reality; good humor is an acceptance of it." Malcolm Muggeridge  

04/01

Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me. Chinese Proverb  

04/02

"Always remember that you are absolutely unique, just like everyone else." Margaret Mead  

04/03

"If God wanted us to be brave, why did he give us legs?" Marvin Kitman  

04/04

"I never learned hate at home, or shame. I had to go to school for that." Dick Gregory  

04/05

"I call architecture frozen music." Johann Wolfgang von Goethe  

04/06

"The contest for the ages has been to rescue liberty from the grasp of executive power." Daniel Webster  

04/07

"I had the blues because I had no shoes until upon the street, I met a man who had no feet." Dennis Waitley  

04/08

"Change before you have to." Jack Welch  

04/09

" And so my fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country." John F. Kennedy  

04/10

"Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask what's for lunch." Orson Welles  

04/11

"Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever." Napoleon Bonaparte  

04/12

"I'm not overweight. I'm just nine inches too short." Shelly Winters  

04/13

"Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?" Steven Wright  

04/14

"When there is an income tax, the just man will pay more and the unjust less on the same amount of income." Plato  

04/15

"The hardest thing to understand in the world is the income tax." Albert Einstein  

04/16

"Familiarity breeds contempt - and children." Mark Twain  

04/17

"We have the Bill of Rights. What we need is a Bill of Responsibilities." Bill Maher  

04/18

"Everything has its limit. Iron ore cannot be educated into gold." Mark Twain  

04/19

"President Bush said the other day the war is not about timetables. It's about winning. Hey, it worked in Florida." Jay Leno  

04/20

"I cook with wine. Sometimes I even add it to the food." W.C. Fields  

04/21

"I had a friend who was a clown. When he died, all his friends went to the funeral in one car." Steven Wright  

04/22

"I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception. I asked this girl to sleep with me and she said 'No'." Woody Allen  

04/23

Hobbes: "Do you think there's a God?" Calvin: "Well, SOMEBODY'S out to get me." Bill Watterson  

04/24

"The man who tried his best and failed is superior to the man who never tried." Bud Wilkinson  

04/25

"Being a lady is an attitude." Chuck Woolery  

04/26

"A sobering thought: what if, at this very moment, I am living up to my full potential?" Jane Wagner  

04/27

"Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting." Karl Wallenda  

04/28

A good man is hard to find Flannery O'Connor Book Title

04/29

"A hard man is good to find." Mae West  

04/30

"The greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions and not our circumstances." Martha Washington  

05/01

"When the media ask George W. Bush a question, he answers, 'Can I use a lifeline?'" Robin Williams  

05/02

"I have often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife to go swimming." Jimmy Carter  

05/03

"If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead." Johnny Carson  

05/04

"(He) called me a rapist and a recluse. I'm not a recluse." Mike Tyson  

05/05

"You can't lead anyone else further than you have gone yourself." Gene Mauch Coach

05/06

" A good politician is quite as unthinkable as an honest burglar." H.L. Mencken  

05/07

"After all, tomorrow is another day." Margaret Mitchell  

05/08

"Before marriage, a girl has to make love to a man to hold him. After marriage, she has to hold him to make love to him." Marilyn Monroe  

05/09

"Having a family is like having a bowling alley installed in your head." Martin Mull  

05/10

"A good system shortens the road to the goal." Orison Swett Marden  

05/11

"It's useless to hold a person to anything he says while he's in love, drunk, or running for office." Shirley MacLaine  

05/12

"Ya gotta believe! Tug McGraw  

05/13

"Whoever said, 'It's not whether you win or lose that counts,' probably lost." Martina Navratilova  

05/14

"The surest way to hit a woman's heart is to take aim kneeling." Douglas William Jerrold  

05/15

"Everybody likes a compliment." Abraham Lincoln  

05/16

"Notice that the stiffest tree is most easily cracked, while the bamboo or willow survives by bending with the wind." Bruce Lee  

05/17

"If you hold a cat by the tail you will learn things you cannot learn any other way." Mark Twain  

05/18

"The more I see the less I know for sure." John Lennon  

05/19

"There is no success without hardship." Sophocles  

05/20

"It's not the having, it's the getting." Elizabeth Taylor  

05/21

"You want a friend in Washington? Get a dog." Harry S. Truman  

05/22

Dancing: The vertical expression of a horizontal desire legalized by music." George Bernard Shaw  

05/23

"You cannot escape the responsibility of tomorrow by evading it today." Abraham Lincoln  

05/24

"When I was kidnapped, my parents sprung into action. They rented out my room." Woody Allen  

05/25

"The first duty of man is the seeking after and the investigation of truth." Cicero  

05/26

"Hold faithfulness and sincerity as first principles." Confucius  

05/27

"Make your life necessary to somebody. Do not make life hard to any." Ralph Waldo Emerson  

05/28

"He that falls in love with himself will have no rivals." Benjamin Franklin  

05/29

"Whatever you can do or dream, begin it." Johann Wolfgang von Goethe  

05/30

"I don't think anyone should write their autobiography until after they're dead." Samuel Goldwyn  

05/31

"In matters of style, swim with the current; in matters of principle, stand like a rock." Thomas Jefferson  

06/01

"We must learn to live together as brothers or perish together as fools." Martin Luther King  

06/02

"Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana." Groucho Marx  

06/03

"Injustice is relatively easy to bear; what stings is justice H.L. Mencken  

06/04

"Only sick music makes money today." Friedrich Nietzsche  

06/05

"If someone betrays you once it's their fault; if they betray you twice, it's your fault." Eleanor Roosevelt  

06/06

"It is never too late to give up your prejudices." Henry David Thoreau  

06/07

"You might as well fall flat on your face as lean over too far backward." James Thurber  

06/08

"It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong." Voltaire  

06/09

"I guess I'm gonna fade into Bolivian." Mike Tyson  

06/10

"A celebrity is someone who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized." Fred Allen  

06/11

"It isn't the mountains to climb ahead that wear you out; it's the pebble in your shoe." Muhammad Ali  

06/12

"Houston, Tranquility base here. The Eagle has landed." Neil Armstrong  

06/13

"Simply stated, it is sagacious to eschew obfuscation." Norman Augustine  

06/14

"I trust that everything happens for a reason, even when we're not wise enough to see it." Oprah Winfrey  

06/15

"I don't think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my crib." Woody Allen  

06/16

"If I had my life to live over, I'd live over a saloon." W.C. Fields  

06/17

"I went to a 7-11 and asked for a 2x4 and a box of 3x5's. The clerk said ten-four." Steven Wright  

06/18

"Life doesn't imitate art. It imitates bad television." Woody Allen  

06/19

Luke Skywalker: "I don't believe it!" Yoda: "That is why you fail." George Lucas  

06/20

"People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid." Soren Kierkegaard  

06/21

"The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work." Emile Zola  

06/22

"Assassins!" Arturo Toscanini ... to his orchestra

06/23

"I don't know why we are here, but I'm pretty sure that it is not to enjoy ourselves." Ludwig Wittgenstein  

06/24

"Try to learn something about everything and everything about something." Thomas Henry Huxley  

06/25

"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." Forrest Tucker  

06/26

"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." Winston Churchill  

06/27

"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow  

06/28

"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." William Faullner About Ernest Hemingway

06/29

"Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something." Plato  

06/30

"How do you tell a communist? Well, it's someone who reads Marx and Lenin. And how do you tell an anti-communist? It's someone who understamds Marx and Lenin." Ronald Reagan  

07/01

"When I meet a man I ask myself, 'Is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?'" Rita Rudner  

07/02

"Honesty is the cornerstone of all success, without which confidence and ability to perform shall cease to exist." Mary Kay Ash  

07/03

"The very atmosphere of firearms anywhere and everywhere restrains evil interference - they deserve a place of honor with all that's good." George Washington  

07/04

Happy Fourth! Factel Staff  

07/05

"What is not started today is never finished tomorrow." Johann Wolfgang von Goethe  

07/06

"Humor is mankind's greatest blessing." Mark Twain  

07/07

"The reason there are two senators from each state is so that one can be the designated driver." Jay Leno  

07/08

"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book, I'll waste no time reading it." Moses Haldas  

07/09

"He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know." Abraham Lincoln  

07/10

"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends." Oscar Wilde  

07/11

" I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend ... if you have one." George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill

07/12

" I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." Stephen Bishop  

07/13

"Race hate isn't human nature; race hate is the abandonment of human nature." Orson Welles  

07/14

"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." Mark Twain  

07/15

"He is a self-made man and worships his creator." John Bright  

07/16

"I just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial." Irvin S. Cobb  

07/17

"He has the attention span of a lightening bolt." Robert Redford  

07/18

"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." Mae West  

07/19

"In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. But in practice there is." Yogi Berra  

07/20

"Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed." George Burns  

07/21

"Dancing is silent poetry." Simonides (556-468 BC)

07/22

"Wherever I climb I am followed by a dog called 'Ego'." Friedrich Nietzsche  

07/23

"He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death." H.H. Munro  

07/24

"If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars." J. Paul Getty  

07/25

"Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away." Antoine de Saint Exupery  

07/26

"Sleep is an excellent way of listening to an opera." James Stephens  

07/27

"I do not consider it an insult, but rather a compliment to be called an agnostic. I do not pretend to know where many ignorant men are sure -- that is all agnosticism means." Clarence Darrow Scopes Trial, 1925

07/28

"There are people in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in the form of bread." Mahatma Gandhi  

07/29

"Everyone is a genius once a year; a real genius has his ideas closer together." Georg Lichtenberg  

07/30

"While we are postponing, life speeds by." Seneca (3 BC - 65 AD)

07/31

"Luck is the residue of design." Branch Rickey  

08/01

"Wit is educated insolence." Aristotle (384 BC - 322 BC)

08/02

"The secret of success is to know something nobody else knows." Aristotle Onassis  

08/03

"It ain't those parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts I do understand." Mark Twain  

08/04

"Losers live in the past. Winners learn from the past and enjoy working in the present toward the future." Dennis Waitley  

08/05

"The purpose of all wars, is peace." St. Augustine  

08/06

"How much time he saves who does not look to see what his neighbor says or does or thinks." Marcus Aurelius  

08/07

"The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause." Mark Twain  

08/08

"No duty is more urgent than that of returning thanks." James Allen  

08/09

"In politics, stupidity is not a handicap." Napoleon Bonaparte  

08/10

"The advancement and diffusion of knowledge is the only guardian of true liberty." James Madison  

08/11

"Women cannot complain about men anymore, until they start getting better taste in them." Bill Maher  

08/12

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." Emo Philips  

08/13

"One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know." Groucho Marx  

08/14

"Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured." Mark Twain  

08/15

"The Washington Bullets are changing their name. They don't want their name to be associated with crime. From now on, they'll just be known as the Bullets." Jay Leno  

08/16

"Think off-center." George Carlin  

08/17

"Once, during prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water." W.C. Fields  

08/18

"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us." Bill Watterson  

08/19

"It's better to be looked over than overlooked." Mae West  

08/20

"Unless both sides win, no agreement can be permanent." Jimmy Carter  

08/21

"I'm not always right because I'm the manager, but I'm always right because I'm the manager." Gene Mauch  

08/22

"A dog that trots about finds a bone." Golda Meir  

08/23

"Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't they'd be married too." H.L. Mencken  

08/24

"Be larger than your task." Orison Swett Marden  

08/25

"Happiness is a warm gun." John Lennon  

08/26

"I would have made a good Pope." Richard Nixon  

08/27

"If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me." Alice Roosevelt Longworth  

08/28

"They know enough who know how to learn." Henry B. Adams  

08/29

"Prejudice is opinion without judgment." Voltaire  

08/30

"It is hard to believe that a man is telling the truth when you know that you would lie if you were in his place." H.L. Mencken  

08/31

"Talk to a man about himself and he will listen for hours." Benjamin Disraeli  

09/01

"None of us will ever accomplish anything excellent or commanding except when he listens to this whisper which is heard by him alone." Ralph Waldo Emerson  

09/02

"Who is rich? He that is content. Who is that? Nobody." Benjamin Franklin  

09/03

"Walking is the best possible exercise. Habituate yourself to walk very far." Thomas Jefferson  

09/04

"Out of life's school of war: What does not destroy me, makes me stronger." Friedrich Nietzsche  

09/05

"Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself." Eleanor Roosevelt  

09/06

"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying that I approved of it." Mark Twain  

09/07

"Whatever you fear most has no power - it is your fear that has the power." Oprah Winfrey  

09/08

"Your life is what your thoughts make it." Marcus Aurelius  

09/09

"It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up." Muhammad Ali  

09/10

"They've got us surrounded again, poor bastards." General Creighton W. Abrams  

09/11

"He who spares the wicked injures the good." Seneca  

09/12

"Force is all-conquering, but its victories are short-lived." Abraham Lincoln  

09/13

"Laws are silent in times of war." Cicero  

09/14

"An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last." Sir Winston Churchill  

09/15

"Only the dead have seen the end of war." Plato  

09/16

"Patriotism means to stand by the country. It does not mean to stand by the president." Theodore Roosevelt  

09/17

"War does not determine who is right, only who is left." Bertrand Russell  

09/18

"How soon we forget history ... Government is not reason. Government is not eloquence. It is force. And, like fire, it is a dangerous servant and a fearful master." George Washington  

09/19

"The fight is won or lost far away from witnesses - behind the lines, in the gym, and out there on the road, long before I dance under those lights." Muhammad Ali  

09/20

"Patience is the companion of wisdom." St. Augustine  

09/21

"The means of defense against foreign danger historically have become the instruments of tyranny at home." James Madison  

09/22

"My doctor asked me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people." Orson Welles  

09/23

"Where do you go to get anorexia?" Shelly Winters  

09/24

"It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare." Mark Twain  

09/25

"There is no duty more obligatory than the repayment of kindness." Cicero  

09/26

"I used to be Snow White, but I drifted." Mae West  

09/27

"If you do not feel yourself growing in your work and your life broadening and deepening, if your task is not a perpetual tonic to you, you have not found your place." Orison Swett Marden  

09/28

" No one can earn a million dollars honestly." William Jennings Bryan  

09/29

"I love Micky Mouse more than any woman I have ever known." Walt Disney  

09/30

"The graveyards are full of indespensible men." Charles de Gaulle  

10/01

"Behind every great fortune there is a crime." Honore de Balzak  

10/02

"Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere." Martin Luther King.  

10/03

"It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop." Confucius  

10/04

"I am not young enough to know everything." Oscar Wilde  

10/05

"Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same." Oscar Wilde  

10/06

"I don't even butter my bread; I consider that cooking." Katherine Cebrian  

10/07

"You got to be careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there." Yogi Berra  

10/08

"Anything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung." Voltaire  

10/09

"No sane man will dance." Cicero  

10/10

"The louder he talked of his honor, the faster we counted our spoons." Ralph Waldo Emerson  

10/11

"Lennox Lewis, I'm coming for you man. My style is impetuous. My defense is impregnable, and I'm just ferocious. I want your heart. I want to eat his children. Praise be to Allah!" Mike Tyson  

10/12

"It is now possible for a flight attendant to get a pilot pregnant." Richard J. Ferris President of American Airlines

10/13

"Some guy hit my fender, and I told him, 'Be fruitful and multiply', but not in those words." Woody Allen  

10/14

"Attention to health is life's greatest hindrance." Plato  

10/15

"Plato was a bore." Friedrich Nietzsche  

10/16

"Nietzsche was stupid and abnormal." Leo Tolstoy  

10/17

"I'm not going to get into the ring with Mr. Tolstoy." Ernest Hemingway  

10/18

"Hemingway was a jerk." Harold Robbins  

10/19

"To sit alone with my conscience will be judgment enough for me." Charles William Stubbs  

10/20

"Opportunities multiply as they are seized." Sun Tzu  

10/21

"Sometimes it is not enough to do our best; we must do what is required." Winston Churchill  

10/22

"Ask her to wait a moment - I am almost done." Carl Friedrich Gauss While working, when informed his wife was dying

10/23

"If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?" Will Rogers  

10/24

"We have always said that in our war with the Arabs we had a secret weapon - no alternative." Golda Meir  

10/25

"There is no reason why anyone would want a computer in their home." Ken Olson President, Chairman and Founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977

10/26

"Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?" H.M. Warner Warner Brothers founder, 1927

10/27

"We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out." Decca Recording Co. Rejecting the Beatles, 1962

10/28

"We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees." Jason Kidd Upon being drafted by the Dallas Mavericks

10/29

"Love is friendship set on fire." Jeremy Taylor  

10/30

"I worship the quicksand he walks on." Art Buchwald  

10/31

"If voting changed anything, they'd make it illegal." Emma Goldman  

11/01

"When we hear news we should always wait for the sacrament of confirmation." Voltaire  

11/02

"The price good men pay for indifference to public affairs is to be ruled by evil men." Plato  

11/03

"It's a dangerous business going out your front door." J.R.R. Tolkien  

11/04

"Treat employees like partners, and they act like partners." Fred Allen  

11/05

"A man's manners are a mirror in which he shows his portrait." Johann Wolfgang von Goethe  

11/06

"Vote early and vote often." Al Capone  

11/07

"To lengthen thy life, lessen thy meals." Benjamin Franklin  

11/08

"It is easier to stay out than get out." Mark Twain  

11/09

"It ain't what they call you. It's what you answer to." W.C Fields  

11/10

"I never smoked a cigarette until I was nine." H.L. Mencken  

11/11

"I destroy my enemies when I make them my friends." Abraham Lincoln  

11/12

"If I was your husband, I'd drink it." Winston Churchill Retort to Lady Astor, a teetotaller seated next to him at a dinner party. He was enjoying a coctail when she leaned over and said, "If you were my husband, I'd put poison in that drink."

11/13

"When you do not know a thing, to allow that you do not know it -- this is knowledge." Confucius  

11/14

"If a business is worth a dollar and I can buy it for forty cents, something good may happen to me." Warren Buffett  

11/15

"The world is a book, and those who do not travel read only a page." St. Augustine  

11/16

"It takes as much energy to wish as it does to plan." Eleanor Roosevelt  

11/17

"There is nothing new in the world except the history you do not know." Harry Truman  

11/18

"The truth is that all men having power ought to be mistrusted." James Madison  

11/19

"Toil to make yourself remarkable by some talent or other." Seneca  

11/20

"It is easier to stay out than to get out." Mark Twain  

11/21

"Ten men waiting for me at the door? Send one of them home, I'm tired." Mae West  

11/22

"You are built not to shrink down to less but to blossom into more." Oprah Winfrey  

11/23

"For age and want, save while you may; no morning sun lasts the whole day." Benjamin Franklin  

11/24

"Fashion is made to become unfashionable." Coco Chanel  

11/25

"Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone." Pablo Picasso  

11/26

"A wise man should have money in his head, but not in his heart." Jonathan Swift  

11/27

"As life closes in on someone who has borrowed far too much money on the strength of far too little income, there are no fire escapes." John Kenneth Gailbraith  

11/28

"Puritanism. The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy." H.L. Mencken  

11/29

"To you, I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition." Woody Allen  

11/30

"To be content with what one has is the greatest and truest of riches." Cicero  

12/01

"One should count each day a separate life." Seneca  

12/02

"If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much." Mark Twain  

12/03

"A golden rule for every businessman is this: Put yourself in your customer's place." Orison Swett Marden  

12/04

"You're never beaten until you admit it." General George S. Patton, Jr.  

12/05

"Whoever wishes to see the future must consult the past." Machiavelli  

12/06

"I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals." Winston Churchill  

12/07

"The humble suffer when the mighty disagree." Phaedrus  

12/08

Do not try to fight a lion if you are not one yourself. African Proverb  

12/09

He who strikes the first blow admits he's lost the arguement Chinese Proverb  

12/10

"Whatever you are, be a good one." Abraham Lincoln  

12/11

"The truth is a beautiful and terrible thing, and therefore should be treated with caution." J.K. Rowling  

12/12

"No persons are more frequently wrong, than those who will not admit they are wrong." Francois de la Rochefoucauld  

12/13

"The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity." Dorothy Parker  

12/14

"It is no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense." Mark Twain  

12/15

"It is foolish and wrong to mourn the men that died. Rather we should thank God that such men lived." General George S. Patton, Jr.  

12/16

"An intellectual is a man who takes more words than necessary to tell more than he knows." Dwight D. Eisenhower  

12/17

"Europe was created by history. America was created by philosophy." Margaret Thatcher  

12/18

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house, Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse; The stockings were hung by the chimny with care, In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there; The children were nestled all snug in their beds, While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads; And mamma in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap, Had just settled our brains for a long winter's nap, Major Henry Livingston, Jr.  

12/19

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter. Away to the window I flew like a flash, tore open the shutters and threw up the sash. The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow, gave the luster of mid-day to objects below, When what to my wondering eyes should appear, But a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer, Major Henry Livingston, Jr.  

12/20

With a little old driver, so lively and quick, I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick. More rapid than eagles his coursers they came, And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name; "Now Dasher! now Dancer! now Prancer and Vixen! On, Comet! on Cupid! on Donder and Blitzen! To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall! Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!" Major Henry Livingston, Jr.  

12/21

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly, When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky; So up to the house-top the coursers they flew, With the sleigh full of toys, and St. Nicholas too. And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof, The prancing and pawing of each little hoof. As I drew in my head, and was turning around, Down the chimny St. Nicholas came with a bound. Major Henry Livingston, Jr.  

12/22

He was dressed all in fur from his head to his foot, And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot; A bundle of toys he had flung on his back, And he looked like a peddler just opening his pack. His eyes - how they twinkled! his dimples how merry! His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry! His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow, And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow; Major Henry Livingston, Jr.  

12/23

The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth, And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath; He had a broad face and a round little belly, That shook when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly. He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf, And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself; A wink of his eye and a twist of his head, Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread; Major Henry Livingston,